People run in RUNMAGEDON (an extreme race with obstacles), compete in triathlon competitions or iron man, to know the limits of their own – physical and mental endurance. This is one method. You prepare for a dozen months, and then bam! There is a run: start, obstacles, obstacles, more obstacles, and bam – the end. Being with children, you have a completely different situation, because how could you prepare for this permanent fatigue – it is impossible to sleep or rest on the stock – so, unfortunately, it does not work like preparing for a running competition. It’s bam! – that is, the birth of a child and following are many, many months of sometimes murderous mental and physical struggles with oneself, the partner, the child itself, and the environment.
Talent: Energy Management
There is a reason for energy management to emerge as the first and key talent. Energy is everything Albert Einstein proved, so it all starts and ends there if it is neglected. In the ideal version, it determines the state of power resulting from mental strength – I believe in myself, I have a positive picture of the world and the environment, I have the resources to cope with the challenges – and physical: I care about valuable nutrition, rest and movement, so that my condition and health are good and sufficient to cope with the next challenges.
The state of your life energy is, in my opinion, the result of attitudes towards yourself, the world, life, beliefs about not only your health and fitness, but also the situation in which you define who you are (the story you tell yourself) and how you feed your body and mind every day, how you care about them. I will emphasize once again –the state of your life energy is only a result of your meticulous life strategy, even if you have never looked at it before. So it’s safe to say that your current state of life energy reflects what you’ve done or haven’t done for years. Just take note of it, because it’s quite sneaky! When we think about energy, we often focus on its physical aspect, which is what we do with our bodies. The truth is, however, that some of the elements on which the quantity and quality of energy in life depends is hidden, you do not have access to them every day. Because every day you do not wonder what beliefs or values you have, but they mainly determine your everyday life. In moments of challenge, heightened stress, we lose the most life energy through our heads and not our stomachs!
Misunderstandings, quarrels, periods of “silence” before or after the storm, are a result of unworked beliefs or a negative view of a world that was not mine at all. But what was mine from that moment, are the results of poor mental strength. How many times have I felt that I am feeling low with no reason at all; for example Sunday together, which could pass in joy and fun, completely unable to “let go” of those emotions that I experienced.
Because food and rest are obvious and visible, but what stories you tell yourself, how the beliefs you carry in you work on whether you have the strength to deal with a particular situation or not, or whether you realize the mechanisms that guide you in a situation of stress – these are invisible things. Only their consequences are visible, sometimes too late. How many marriages, partnerships at this stage are “overturned” and ended? Because no one knows how to bear this burden. How many professional relationships are tense or even conflicted, though they should be manageable?
In the meantime, it is precisely the most difficult situations that are happening in the so-called good homes, that is, where people are educated, have good material status, are employed in good positions in good companies or run their quite thriving businesses. Seemingly, outside everything looks like a dream life there, a life fulfilled. And yet, if you can talk, so much, very sincerely, it turns out that eyes covered with Ray-Ban glasses are crying, and the Michael Kors bag in their hand serves to make a nervous crease because in their heart lives deeply hidden sadness, emptiness, and loneliness.
Personal energy management system/energy audit
Analyzing this talent, I came across energy-related slogans for the world of automation, machines, robots. Entire energy management systems of machines, companies, cities are developed. However, no one pays attention to us or teaches us to develop and operate in accordance with the PERSONAL ENERGY MANAGEMENT SYSTEM. It’s not just about avoiding fatigue, it’s about understanding how those few years spent with young children can translate into your habits and the outcome is that it affects your body and mind, which is mental and physical health in the long term. It is not a preparation for a relatively short-term effort, like a marathon… only for a lifestyle with young children, read stress-laden, unknown (what tonight, the day will bring), risk management (or getting to know the world, the child will not do anything) and physically limit your own resources (because you will not arrive, do not sleep).
You can take advantage of my individual energy audit, or 11 rules, of the Personal Energy Management System. With each wording, mark yes or no to know in which areas you can strengthen your mental or physical strength.
- I nourish my body consciously: I eat valuable food 5 meals a day and drink min 2 liters of water per day
- I train at least twice a week to have physical strength, fit body, and fitness
- I can adapt my strength to support everyday needs – they are adapted to the distribution of day and my duties and biological personal time (larks and owls)
- I delegate tasks, I share responsibility, I engage others in activities.
- I ask for support in difficult or crisis situations.
- I care about my energy supply every day (I know what it adds to me and I know what takes it away from me).
- I respect my limits of physical endurance) (sudden falling asleep regardless of the time of day, body aches).
- I respect my limits of mental endurance) (bad mood, feeling irritable, aggressive reactions, lack of patience, remorse).
- I can break negative strategies and apply positive ones.
- I can work with my own beliefs to build on the supporters.
- I can change the stories I tell myself and work with internal speakers.
Often managers ask me how to support the involvement of their employees? I think let’s start not with commitment but energy. First your own. 😉 And to you, what helps you take care of your energy?
The article is an excerpt from the book “5 Awakened Talents – the Competence of the Leaders of the Future”. You can order it on www.sylwialewandowska.com
Sylwia is the author of the leadership methodology and book “5 Awakened Talents – Competencies for Leaders of the Future”, which she self-published in 2018. It is a guide to transforming organizations and individuals, addressing key aspects of the change process. It introduces an innovative combination of leadership and parenting, being a practical collection of over 50 practices, tools, and applications for leaders who want to consciously make a positive impact on their everyday environment, both business and family. It forms the basis of all the programs we run.